What a High School Lesson taught me

During early 1990s my children were in high school. There were two lessons in their English textbook, which I liked the most and both of them touched my heart. One of the lessons was titled “One Dollar”. I forgot the author who penned it. But it held a beautiful message which even now I remember very vividly. When I saw the title for the first time I thought it was one of those beautiful stories of O Henry: Gift of Magi or One dollar eighty seven cents. It was not. But when I read the story, I felt it was equally poignant and with profound message to us (at least I felt that way for myself.) Let me recount the story. The story starts in first person.

“I was invited by my friend one evening for dinner. I promptly accepted the invitation and presented myself at his residence. We had a whale of a time. After sumptuous dinner it was time for me to leave. My friend offered to drive me home in his car. It was a double blessing. Not only I had free viand but also free ride back home.

On the way my friend stopped the car at a gas station for filling the gas. He found that he was short of one dollar for the gas. He borrowed one dollar from me. After a smooth ride, he dropped me at my residence and after mutual pleasantries he took leave of me.

Next day onwards the thought of that one dollar I lent to my friend never left me. Curiously my friend never raised that topic. We did meet many times after that dinner and it seemed the one dollar completely vanished from his memory. I tried my best to remind him of that one dollar he owed me, not directly but “subtly” bringing him around the topic. ‘You remember when I visited your house on that day and we were returning to my home, you were short of one dollar for the gas?’ Or ‘this is the gas station where you filled the gas on the day we travelled to my home.’ But no use; he listened and went on to other subject.

Slowly the hope of getting back that one dollar evaporated. Then it stuck me that I have also been avoiding returning “one dollar” to my colleagues on numerous occasions in the past. When I started recollecting all those instances the cumulative amount swelled quite a bit. I must have forgotten many others also. “Here am I worrying about that one dollar I lent to my friend who hosted me at his residence with sumptuous dinner and gave a free ride back home in his car whereas I borrowed from my friends and even acquaintances many such one dollars and conveniently forgot to pay them back. I did not host any dinner for them or dropped them back to their homes!

Why is it that money I lent (however much insignificant) I always remember but not the money I borrow (even if it is more than one dollar) from others.”

I forgot the rest of the story and how it ended. But I realised that my behaviour towards others had not been much different from that of the person in the story. Why only treat this “one dollar” merely as an issue of financial interaction? I feel that is only symbolic. We may extend the logic to other spheres of social interaction. How many times did I promise others that I would do this or get the job done for them or such “one dollar” things! How I lied and gave flimsy and unconvincing reasons for not doing what I promised and side-stepped the matter altogether. From the day I read the story, I decided that “that one dollar” should be my motivation or Mantra to drive my life to be truthful to myself.

I am not sure if it is the case with others. It is not impossible to put to practice. But many other factors in the form of social obligations, compulsions to be always on the “perceived” right side, and of course not to displease the near and dear ones come in the way. The beauty is despite all these weaknesses the social fabric among the people is not becoming fragile. In fact it is so resilient that we continue to have the connectivity thanks mainly due to our “understanding”.   

What do you say?